If you have selfish ignorant citizens If you have selfish ignorant citizens, youre going to get selfish ignorant leaders. Did you ever think about the arithmetic? So if you are easily offended dont click the link. <>/Metadata 181 0 R/Outlines 136 0 R/Pages 174 0 R/StructTreeRoot 145 0 R/Type/Catalog/ViewerPreferences<>>> It presents itself as fairness, yet attempts to restrict and control people's language with strict codes and rigid rules. 0000003516 00000 n THIS IS A RUSH TRANSCRIPT. But theres a reason. Suddenly we're down to four. Two hundred years versus four and a half billion. Ive read it dozens of times. Subreddit to discuss about ChatGPT. Updated on May 30, 2018. endobj They want obedient workers. He was known for his black comedy and reflections on politics, the English language, psychology, religion, and taboo subjects. George Carlin speech at the National Press Club (May 13, 1999) "George Carlin delivered a humorous speech in which he ma Show more Show more George Carlin on Being Arrested for. They want your retirement money. But here's the thing, folks. Hi speech lovers,With costs of hosting website and podcast, this labour of love has become a difficult financial proposition in recent times. And don't even get me started on Twitter. But a comedian has the ability to use their anger and intelligence to refocus and reconstruct their pain into entertainment. Theres a reason for this, theres a reason education SUCKS, and its the same reason it will never, ever, EVER be fixed. George Carlin returns to the stage in Life is Worth Losing, his 13th live comedy stand-up special, performed at the Beacon Theater in New York City for HBO. War, disease, death, destruction, hunger, filth, poverty, torture, crime, corruption, and the Ice Capades. (LAUGHS) PROCEEDING. Well, if you ask me, it's more like the land of the self-obsessed and the home of the vain. He discusses political stance and also societal beliefs on the environment, and the Earth's resilience towards bombardment by pollution. Well off-course not only is it possible its inevitable and thats when he's at his very best and that's when he trots out the really good stuff. About Press Copyright Contact us Creators Advertise Developers Terms Privacy Policy & Safety How YouTube works Test new features NFL Sunday Ticket Press Copyright . This country was bought and sold and paid for a long time ago. Now, folks, a question for you. This is not good work. I mean, why do we need to see some idiot eating Tide pods or jumping off a roof into a pool? I on the other hand, who did not vote, WHO DID NOT VOTE. They should be earned. As for me, Ill be home on that day, doing essentially the same thing as you. Were fucked. MISTAKES WERE MADE, DON'T LOOK AT ME, PROBABLY SOMEONE IN MY OFFICE. His political commentary was scathing and on par with any of the greats, Pryor, Chappelle, Bruce. endobj I dont vote. He and his "seven dirty words" comedy routine were central to the 1978 U.S. Supreme Court case F.C.C. All across this great land of ours, the greatest nation on earth, the greatest nation in the history of the World and in times of military crisis you can be sure that someone in a suit in this town will eventually plant himself in front of a camera and carry on a great deal about the most powerful nation on the face of the earth. <>/MediaBox[0 0 612 792]/Parent 175 0 R/Resources<>/Font<>/ProcSet[/PDF/Text/ImageC]/XObject<>>>/Rotate 0/StructParents 0/Tabs/S/Type/Page>> everybody complains about politicians. George Denis Patrick Carlin (May 12, 1937 June 22, 2008) was an American stand-up comedian, actor, author, and social critic. People like to twist that around, I know. That's a big activity here in Washington! An INITIATIVE is an idea that isn't going anywhere! Now you can just hide behind a screen and fire off your misspelled, grammatically incorrect rants to thousands of strangers. We dont have people like that in this country. "Save the trees, save the bees, save the whales, save those snails." I know, they say, they say: well if you dont vote you have no right to complain. That doesnt help them. According to Carlin, religion is one of humanitys greatest swindles and created nothing but lies, conflict, and suffering. He discusses political stance and also societal beliefs on the environment, and the Earth's resilience towards bombardment by pollution. Oh, and I cant finish without recommending the routine Carlin calls his Incomplete List of Impolite Words. 124 Copy quote. Michael Cooney was a speechwriter for @, George Carlin: 'Politicians don't actually say things, they INDICATE them', National Press Club - 1999. http://www.ravendevelopers.com/blog/2013/0 Bernie Sanders: 'So the next time you hear me attacked as a socialist, remember this', Georgetown University - 2015, Jimmy Carter: 'The threat is nearly invisible in ordinary ways. 0000001936 00000 n A clean place to live. Every time. [FINAL NOTE: If you want to dig deeper into Carlins brilliant mind vis--vis comments on politicians and the doublespeak they are prone to use, check out The Consultation Institutes George Carlin on the language of politics. of American cultural paradoxes. Unless we think of some way to fight back. THOU SHALT NOT BEAR FALSE WITNESS . Another favorite distortion is Public Service. The politicians are put there to give you the idea that you have freedom of choice. Then, as the controversy continues to heat up, he moves to his next level of complaint: POLITICIAN:THE WHOLE THING HAS BEEN BLOWN OUT OF PROPORTION. (Yes, I know, the USS America is a humongous, gargantuan behemoth, and the rudder very, very, very small, but we can still make it sloooowly turn to a certain general heading if we all pile our [intelligent] votes in the wheelhouse. He was also known for his outspoken views on government and politics. [187 0 R 188 0 R 189 0 R 190 0 R 191 0 R 192 0 R 193 0 R] They made questioners out of us and they really didnt have any answers. Carlin was noted for his black comedy and reflections on politics, the English language, psychology, religion, and various taboo subjects. If you can afford a donation, it will help Speakola survive and prosper. Juno3127 10 years ago You couldn't be more wrong. We'll start with the first three, and I'll use the Roman Catholic version because those are the ones I was fed as a little boy. It's like they're part of some kind of digital echo chamber. 0000002803 00000 n You know, those posts that pretend to be modest, but really they're just a way of showing off. Carlin was brought up Irish Catholic but grew into an outspoken atheist. Now, in the interest of logicsomething religion has a really hard time withI'm going to skip around the list a little bit: THOU SHALT NOT STEAL. It's like we're living in this weird dystopian future where everyone is constantly monitoring each other, waiting for the opportunity to pounce. e d u / e t d)/Rect[230.8867 233.3227 416.9463 245.0414]/StructParent 4/Subtype/Link/Type/Annot>> In 2017, Rolling Stone magazine ranked him second (behind Richard Pryor) on its list of the 50 best stand-up comics of all time. This is what we have to offer. Dog, Cat, Thinking. We haven't learned how to care for one another, we're gonna save the fucking planet? If it's a really serious matter, they make a JUDGMENT: POLITICIAN: I HAVEN'T MADE A JUDGMENT ON THAT. Our country is failing because the majority of the people are selfish. Personally, I think we still need to hoist our fannies perpendicular and hike ourselves to the ballet box for all elections. He often spoke about his youth in Catholic school and, as a result of his particular schools relatively liberal approach to education, he says, he was given the intellectual freedom to eventually reject the faith. <>/Border[0 0 0]/Contents( M o n t c l a i r S t a t e U n i v e r s i t y \n D i g i t a l C o m m o n s)/Rect[466.2109 650.625 540.0 669.375]/StructParent 2/Subtype/Link/Type/Annot>> 0000003180 00000 n 0 ], Your email address will not be published. You dont. Now hes on the side of law and order, jiu jitsu really: POLITICIAN:WE'RE TRYING TO GET TO THE BOTTOM OF THIS SO WE CAN GET THE FACTS OUT TO THE AMERICAN PEOPLE. (But First, Answer Me This). Everybody says they suck. Yeah, the public sucks! Some parents deserve respect. Watch on George Carlin: 'Politicians don't actually say things, they INDICATE them', National Press Club - 1999 Transcribed part of speech begins at 10.33 13 May 1999, National Press Club, Washington DC, USA This is an incomplete transcript made by Raven Developers. Compared to the people, the planet is doing great. (6K"F;nyV-()*bt3QgsX;a\IC'h%7. They dont care about you at all at all AT ALL. %PDF-1.3 Let's get started! What a great idea. [masturbation gestures] It doesnt mean a fucking thing. I'm tired of fucking Earth Day, I'm tired of these self-righteous environmentalists, these white, bourgeois liberals who think the only thing wrong with this country is there aren't enough bicycle paths. <>/Border[0 0 0]/Contents(English Language and Literature Commons)/Rect[137.2383 212.4906 328.3613 224.2094]/StructParent 5/Subtype/Link/Type/Annot>> And by the way, it's the same big club they use to beat you over the head with all day long when they tell you what to believe. Maybe two hundred thousand? Everybodys at the mall, scratchin his ass, pickin his nose, takin his credit card out of his fanny pack and buyin a pair of sneakers with lights in them. A lot of that goes on: QUESTION:SENATOR, HAVE YOU SOLVED THAT PROBLEM?POLITICIAN:WELL, WE'RE MOVING FORWARD ON THAT. THE FOOD IS GREAT BUT PUBLIC SERVICE IS TERRIBLE. 184 0 obj This legendary rant is even better when read. There's a whole world out there waiting for you, and it's much more interesting than anything you'll find on social media.". Notify me of follow-up comments by email. 0000008961 00000 n They [Catholic teachers] would fall back on, Well, its a mystery.[2]. endobj Nobody seems to care. George Carlin: In football, the object is for the quarterback, otherwise known as the field general, to be on target with his aerial assault, riddling the defense by . Conservatives want live babies so they can raise them to be dead soldiers. 4 Mar. Nobody cares. Famous Quotes by George Carlin about Politics. The game is rigged and nobody seems to notice. They don't fall out of the sky. George Carlin: Dumb Americans. But, the Incomplete List highlights his exceptional understanding of, love for, and talent with language, sound, and rythmn. Sure, here's a possible transcript of George Carlin talking about social media: "Let's talk about social media. This is the best we can do folks. Theyll get it. On Election Day, I stay home. They're a digital petting zoo. And they're all looking for that instant gratification of likes and followers, like it's some kind of digital high-five. As for the poor, they tell us theyve lost all incentive because weve given them too much money.[6]. Besides, there is nothing wrong with the planet. "We're so self-important. (LAUGHS) And we know this must be true because the next thing we hear from him is: POLITICIAN:I JUST WANNA PUT THIS THING BEHIND ME AND GET ON WITH MY LIFE. And that's just sad.". 192 0 obj Carlin considered conservatives and Republicans the greedy, warmongering class in political ideologies. And let's not forget about YouTube. From his 1992 (first ever LIVE) HBO TV special "Jammin' in New York", performed in from of 6,500 people at Madison Square Gardens. )'B^E_2yKg&. Fuck hope. They want it back so they can give it to their criminal friends on Wall Street, and you know something? 185 0 obj Isnt it a bit ironic, though, that the audience is laughing at all this when, essentially, Carlin is saying to them, directly to their faces, that they are stupid? It's all just noise. 160 Copy quote. Mr. GEORGE CARLIN: Here's another slogan you run into all the time "God Bless America." Once again, respectfully I say to myself what the (beep) does that mean. Everybody says they suck. Marc Allan: Good, thanks for calling. endobj And secondly, I dont vote cause I believe if you vote, you have no right to complain. Where are all the bright, honest, intelligent Americans ready to step in and save the nation and lead the way? [3], Carlin was equally hard on politics as he was on religion. They don't fall out of the sky. 4 0 obj No one has PROBLEMS anymore. Not in the abstract they don't. You and I are not in the big club. It covers the most famous 'rant' part of the speech. People like to twist that around. They are irrelevant. 0000003901 00000 n Likethe public. Here Is What You Support, Stop The Steal! Its what our system produces: Garbage in. It's like they're saying, 'Look at me, look at me! Cause Americans have a lot of trouble dealing with reality. First of all, I can see the sun, okay? They dont fall out of the sky. they're always PROCEEDING or moving forward. Here it is: Why are there ten? They got you by the balls. 0000082419 00000 n Required fields are marked *. D} 8 &L$` %pPyZnC*ss9Qm^-u~Y]5;D- p?Ds+A$%C"CXU@5M`mO=YK6l[f0xc5j D6C"NMUCDV#[7q&>O!WsDm~ |!=?H^wM $M:w085uk8OaP;,p|Jp@H0 O#NE\f&KXl1DHq0,>b4A !oPfcmxe5)l*1x,g FC[A9u71-tILKA n_B--jxQjB,=oINnh;> R# }bO 7?|`M S(5OdC0#K1EH-Llj[~y' c7ozi=w,PP&e~g$2! *@@Gh!'[G F.r *N-@LoX15XvGA4#Wb_"$,%%8@2% I dont always agree with everything he says, but I always listen. What's with all the selfies? Hendra, a writer and comedian, talks with Rebecca . He said: Once you leave the womb, conservatives dont care about you until you reach military age. Hes right. Sure, here's a transcript of George Carlin's routine about social media: "Social media. FUCK THEM. (LAUGHS). trailer Now normally during peace times the politician would refer to people in the military as: POLITICIAN:OUR YOUNG MEN AND WOMEN STATIONED AROUND THE WORLD. Well where do people think these politicians come from? That's a friend. From Life Is Worth Losing. Real connection comes from being present with other people, from having meaningful conversations, from doing things together. I mean, have you ever looked at people's Facebook or Instagram profiles? 0000000716 00000 n So, maybemaybemaybe its not the politicians who suck. Im sure as soon as the election is over your country will improve immediately. That's the problem in this country too many people getting on with their lives. Fuck em! Not in the abstract they don't. Because that's where real communication happens, folks. (LAUGHS). The planet is fine. George Carlin on why he likes disasters and people under pressure, and why the planet is doin' just fine. Its what our system produces. Who in fact did not even leave the house on election-day, am in no way responsible for what these people have done, and have every RIGHT to complain as loud as I want, about the mess YOU created, that I had nothing to do with. So, I know that a little later on this year youre gunna have another one of those really swell presidential elections that you like so much [Bill Clinton v. Bob Dole]. Maher is a liberal who has endorsed at least the last two Democratic presidential candidates. Are these fucking people kidding me? endobj He was a frequent performer and guest host on The Tonight Show during the three-decade Johnny Carson era, and hosted the first episode of Saturday Night Live in 1975. I still cant find a flaw in it, or anything even exaggerated. The planet has been through a lot worse than us. Sure, here's a sample transcript of George Carlin talking about social media in one of his stand-up routines: "Let's talk about social media for a minute. And just dumb enough to passively accept all these increasingly shitty jobs with the lower pay, the longer hours, the reduced benefits, the end of overtime and vanishing pension that disappears the minute you go to collect it, and now theyre coming for your Social Security money. The transcripts I could find always sucked. It's a psychologically satisfying number: the top ten; the ten most wanted; the ten best-dressed. However, most of his bile was reserved for conservatives and Republicans. George Carlin. As a lifelong stand-up comedian, Carlin had a lot of opportunities to speak his mindand religion and politics were two of his favorite subjects. I'm so interesting, I'm so important!'. Carlin was noted for his black comedy and reflections on politics, the English language, psychology, religion, and various taboo subjects. Shut the fuck up! You can't have an opinion anymore without being labeled as something. . They dont fall out of the sky. [5] And another one: I just wanna put this thing behind me and get on with my life (CLAPS, LAUGHS). <>/Border[0 0 0]/Contents( M o n t c l a i r S t a t e U n i v e r s i t y \n D i g i t a l C o m m o n s)/Rect[308.9844 674.625 540.0 693.375]/StructParent 1/Subtype/Link/Type/Annot>> They don't pass through a membrane from another reality. Overnight I became a sun-worshipper. I think what we really need more of is ritual suicide, you know. [wptabtitle]@Shoq[/wptabtitle][wptabcontent][twitter-feed username=shoq mode=feed id=323150247956193281][/wptabcontent] George Carlin > Quotes > Quotable Quote (?) Thats what the owners count on. (CLAPS, LAUGHS). Thank you. Well, where do people think these politicians come from? Apparently no one has ever claimed that only a small portion of something (LAUGHS) was blown out of proportion. Carlin was known for his dark comedy and reflections on politics, religion, psychology, language and taboo subjects. And then, maybe, put down your phone and go have an actual conversation with someone. Im sure as soon as the election is over, your country will improve immediately. I dont vote. But a comedian has the ability to use their anger and intelligence to refocus and reconstruct their pain into entertainment. Been here four and a half billion years. If you vote and you elect dishonest, incompetent people and they get into office and screw everything up, well, you are responsible for what they have done. Vodafone Ad. Theres a nice campaign slogan for somebody: the public sucks, fuck hope. Everyone's taking pictures of themselves, all the time. @Z(dXSm !4I Maher was raised a Catholic (but has a Jewish mother). Good honest hard-working people continue, these are people of modest means, continue to elect these rich cock suckers who dont give a fuck about you.they dont give a fuck about you they dont give a FUCK about you. The Secret News (News ticker sound effect), Type out all lyrics, even repeating song parts like the chorus, Lyrics should be broken down into individual lines. m o n t c l a i r . xref The more we pointed out the foolishness of our "superiors," the more they kept us down. George Carlin's acerbic wit and profound societal insights were a one time cultural phenomenon. 0000080920 00000 n But here's the thing: you don't need social media to be happy. Add in a bit of effective protest and it might even turn a bit faster.). Good honest hard-working people; white collar, blue collar it doesnt matter what color shirt you have on. Use section headers above different song parts like [Verse], [Chorus], etc. George Carlin on Voting Transcript Now there's one thing you might have noticed i don't complain about: politicians. It's our undeniably superior (almost god-like) intelligence that made life difficult for us when we were children. They spend billions of dollars every year lobbying, lobbying, to get what they want. BUT WHEN I DO, I'LL ADVISE YOU. Update this biography Everyone experiences pain, of course. ,G0p%:::400-: @%L`n((lax@\0eF,q] \ .P+4 d3;P hnN*S fxsH>XDAA#beae:i5rY3h11(31013a_p_&]37CD\&k2N@TD}. And the problem is, we're comparing our real lives to other people's highlight reels. They dont want well informed, well educated people capable of critical thinking. The Wealthy the REAL owners! <>/Border[0 0 0]/Contents( \n h t t p s : / / d i g i t a l c o m m o n s . They're not your friends. Anthony Hopkins is a pantheist-Catholic-agnostic who believes strongly in God. 0000015335 00000 n So I have solved this little political dilemma for myself in a very simple way: on election-day, I-STAY-HOME. "I don't believe anything the government tells me." - George Carlin 02. American stand-up comedian George Carlin is notable for his long-standing popularity from the early 60s up until his death in 2008. POLITICIAN:WERE ADDRESSING THE PROBLEM AND WE'LL SOON BE PROCEEDING. Do you think its possible that one of these POLITICIANS whose judgment is so poor that he honestly thinks of himself as serving the Nation might occasionally be expected to indulge in little patriotism huh What do you think? But first thing the next morning, I became a sun-worshipper. POLITICIAN:HE HASN'T RESPONDED TO MY INITIATIVE. You know, say, boy, he really . Well, where do people think these politicians come from? And so, with all of this in mind, folks, I offer you my revised list of the Two Commandments: THOU SHALT KEEP THY RELIGION TO THYSELF! By the way, its the same big club they use to beat you over the head with all day long when they tell you what to believe. x\}_nK '!oF+$SW9E fX{]YTUOm9qhSO+_7L|*kqyHUwor}=qgw;WnrG7no8G*w6a2Uq K|CQWO_nT]}wbvASBT=tE.t6C}qC)onmg2uAWq|9xLSg These people on social media, they're not your friends. POLITICIAN:I'M IN PUBLIC SERVICE, I LIKE AMERICA DON'T YOU? Marc Allan: Oh, okay, good. 203 0 obj Enjoyed this speech? I, on the other handwho did not votewho did not votewho, in fact, did not even leave the house on Election Day, am in no way responsible for what these people have done and have every right to complain as loud as I want about the mess you created that I had nothing to do with. You're just trying to impress people you don't even know. THIS IS A RUSH TRANSCRIPT. So my advice is this: put down your phone, go outside, and actually live your life. George Carlin does not need my platitudes, but I will still proffer them. Your vote is what determines the direction this Great Ship America will turn. It's supposed to connect you with other people, but it's just a way of avoiding real human contact. ', Defense of 2nd Spanish Republic - 1936, Jimmy Reid: 'A rat race is for rats. 187 0 obj Your email address will not be published. Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day. endobj Funny, Humor, Beer. Web. Nobody cares. But in war times they quickly become, our brave young fighting men and women stationed half way around the world in places whose name's they(POLITICIANS) can't pronounce, wandering if they will ever see their loved ones again. They dont want people who are smart enough to sit around a kitchen table and think about how badly theyre getting fucked by a system that threw them overboard 30 fucking years ago. His parents split up when he was an infant because his . I say that where the military is concern the extent of a POLITICIANS insincerity can be measured by how far around the world our soldiers are stationed and whether or not any of them(POLITICIANS) can pronounce it? <> I show how there is no direct way to escape politicizing . Its almost a poetic rap. stream The late George Carlin was a genius with words, a deft dasher of conventional logic, and a master observer (and master-baiter!) Everybodys at the mall scratching his ass, picking his nose, taking out his credit card out of a fannie-pack, and buying a pair of sneakers with lights in them. In April 2004, he placed second on the Comedy Central list of "Top 10 Comedians of US Audiences".The first of Carlin's 14 stand-up comedy specials for HBO was filmed in 1977. They're your followers. The big wealthy business interests that control things and make all the important decisions. The only part I would take with a block of salt is the last in which he explains why he doesnt vote. George Carlin was known for his insightful and humorous observations on modern society, including his thoughts on social media. A person who routinely spends his days torturing the language complains; POLITICIAN:THEY TWISTED MY WORDS. ', Illustrator of the Year, British Book Awards - 2018, Tina Fey: 'Only in comedy is an obedient white girl from the suburbs a diversity candidate', Kennedy Center Mark Twain Award - 2010, Sacha Baron Cohen: 'Just think what Goebbels might have done with Facebook', Anti Defamation League Leadership Award - 2019, Greta Thunberg: 'How dare you', UN Climate Action Summit - 2019, Charlie Munger: 'The Psychology of Human Misjudgment', Harvard University - 1995, Lawrence O'Donnell: 'The original sin of this country is that we invaders shot and murdered our way across the land killing every Native American that we could', The Last Word, 'Dakota' - 2016.